Your wellbeing after birth: rest, support and when to seek help

Make ordinary care easier to accept

Choose one person you can tell the unpolished version of the day. You might ask them to bring food, take a household job or sit with you while you make a call. A specific request gives someone a practical way to help.

If you are supporting a parent, finish the job you offer: collect the groceries, put them away and leave the kitchen usable. The parent should not have to become a project manager for every offer of help.

Notice when feelings need more support

Feeling tearful, anxious or irritable in the first days can be the baby blues, which usually settle within two weeks. If feelings last longer, worsen or make it hard to cope, speak to your GP, midwife or health visitor. You do not need to wait two weeks if you are struggling now. A health visitor is a nurse or midwife with extra training to support families with young children.

Postnatal means after birth. Postnatal depression can include persistent low mood, loss of enjoyment, anxiety, guilt, difficulty bonding or problems sleeping even when you have the opportunity. Fathers and partners can also experience depression after a birth. A professional can help you understand what is happening.

Sources: NHS, NHS

Write a first sentence for the conversation

You could say: ‘Since the birth, I have been feeling low and finding it difficult to cope. I would like some help.’ Or: ‘I am exhausted, but I still cannot sleep when I get the chance.’ You do not need a diagnosis or a perfectly organised explanation before making contact.

If speaking feels difficult, write the sentence down or ask someone you trust to be with you. Include how long it has been happening and whether you feel safe. Let the clinician ask the next questions.

Know the urgent route

If you need urgent mental-health support in England, call 111 and choose the mental-health option, or ask for an urgent GP appointment. If someone's life is at risk or you cannot keep yourself or someone else safe, call 999 or go to A&E (the hospital emergency department) now.

Outside England, use your local urgent mental-health service; 999 remains the emergency number across the UK. Ask your maternity team to write down the relevant local contacts before you need them. A website or wellbeing tracker is not a crisis service.

Sources: NHS

Put a small rest plan on paper

The NHS suggests asking trusted people for practical support and sharing baby care where possible. Choose a realistic opportunity for rest, then decide who handles the tasks that would otherwise fill that time. If there is no one available overnight, consider whether a daytime helper can cover a short break.

If the plan does not happen, revise it without treating it as another failed task. The question is what support is missing. Persistent exhaustion or difficulty coping is worth discussing with your GP or health visitor.

Sources: NHS